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“Out There…Somewhere”: Little Fuzzy on Masters middle names

When you reach a certain level of prominence in this country, you get the triple name treatment.

You know what I’m talking about: Franklin Delano Roosevelt, John F. Kennedy…


You know, out here at the Augusta National Golf Course, there are people who have reached a certain level of prominence. Jordon, Jack and Gary. And with the most knowledgeable golf fans in the world certainly they know their middle names. 

“Jordon Spieth. What’s his middle name,” I asked.

“That’s my guy too and I don’t know”, said Golf fan from Phillyt

“Jordon Spieth?”

“I don’t know,” he said. 

“Jack [Nicklaus] what’s the middle name,” I asked.

“I forgot,” said another Masters patron.

“And you call yourself a fan.” I joked.

“I know”, he said with a laugh.

“Jordon Spieth has a middle name what is it golf fan?” I asked another patron.

“I do not know it,” said the patron from Texas with a laugh. 

“Sweet little Gary Player” It’s a first name, said a lady golf patron.

“Sweet little is not his middle name.” I said. 

“Jack’s Middle name would be…?”

“I don’t know…oh for two”, said another Patron.

“Gary Player?”

“I’m going to strike out here.” he said. 

“The Bear,” said our Philly patron

“It’s not his middle name.”

“Oh come on  it’s got it be,” he said pleadingly 

“79 Masters Champion, do you know Jordon Spieth’s middle name?”

“Don’t have a clue.”

“Jack Nicklaus middle name?” 

“Don’t have a clue”,

“Gary Player’s middle name?”

“Don’t have a clue”, 

“You act like I’m married to these people, I just know them as fellow golfers I don’t know what their middle names are.”

“All right for the record, patrons: Its Jordan Alexander, Jack William, and Gary Jim. But don’t feel too bad, Fuzzy didn’t know it either.